Not what I thought you meant.

Have you ever had two people say the exact same thing, but, in fact, they are talking about completely different things? The best example from my life is the word, “soon.” One time in particular we were driving home and one of my children had to go potty. My wife said, “Just hold it if you can because we will be home soon.” I was flabbergasted, we were no less than 15 minutes away from home. Miles away and my wife still used the word “soon” in regards to when we would be home.

So I asked her (I know, a mistake), what she thought was too long for something to be soon. She saw through my gambit and accused me of attacking her use of the word. She wasn’t wrong. For me, soon is like right around the corner or just a couple minutes. The kids agreed and now they ask, “Is it “mom soon” or “dad soon”? When we tell them something is soon. Smart kids. 

Same word, different meanings. You get what I’m saying. 

In the gospel this Sunday we hear of a similar “same words, different meaning” moment. James and John ask if they can be made leaders in Jesus’ kingdom. They want to sit at Jesus’ left and right. They literally want to be Jesus’ right (and left) hand man. Jesus asks in reply, “Are you sure you can do this?” He asks specifically if they think they can drink of the same cup and receive the same baptism as he is about to receive. Of course, they say yes.

What they are saying yes to, in their minds, is the cup of an earthy king – choice wine in abundance. The baptism they anticipate is the like the Roman baths of Herod – luxurious places of comfort. 

What Jesus means by cup is the cup of his Passion. What Jesus means by his baptism is the baptism in his own blood on the cross. While James and John want leadership in an earthly way with comfort and abundance, Jesus means leadership in the heavenly kingdom which will take suffering and total self gift. This is a kingdom they can’t imagine. 

Jesus goes on to talk about servant leadership and what means to lead in the Kingdom of God. In the Kingdom of God, leaders lead on behalf of and to benefit the people. More often than not earthly leadership benefits the leaders and not the people. Servant leadership, heavenly leadership takes the total gift of self from the leader on behalf of the people. Leaders in the Kingdom of God serve the people.

When we are at our best we adhere our leadership to this model. Whether it is at work, in our families, or even amongst our friends, when we are servant leaders we glorify God. When the Church is at her best, our bishops and priests act as selfless servant leaders. We all know what happens when they don’t. When we are in positions of leadership, let’s do it as servant leaders.

LIVE IT: Do one of the following two options: 1) Return a misplaced shopping cart either to the store or a cart corral (one that isn’t yours) OR 2) Pick up a piece of trash off a the floor somewhere it isn’t your job to clean. When you do one of these things, say a prayer offering up that act to God and asking to be made a better servant leader. 

“Where do babies come from?” The Good Word for Oct 4th.

For the complete Sunday readings click here.

“Daddy, where do babies come from?” Yikes. All parents of young children have been faced with this question. For some of us, it was a scary moment. Others probably handled it better than I did. What is the right answer?

If I had a do-over on that one, I think I would answer like this, “Babies come from LOVE.” Maybe it’s not the whole answer, but it’s not wrong. God is love (1 John 4:8). And my babies came from the love my wife and I have for each other. This kind of love isn’t just affection or even friendship (or romantic attraction), but from a deep, intimate, self-sacrificing love that God gave us for each other.

Out of this kind of love, God gave us the ability to make children. I remember the first time it really struck me that God gifted my wife and I the ability to co-create another human. This little baby my wife is holding has a soul. This human is made in the image and likeness of God, just like Adam and Eve. This is such a powerful and amazing reality. God gives us the ability to co-create a human with a soul – a human that God wants to live with forever in heaven. Wow.

In the gospel this weekend, Jesus talks about marriage and children. He does so because both of these pieces of the human experience are so incredibility powerful and important. Marriage is good. Children are good. Both cost us something personally, but that is good too.
The thing is that we live in this broken world. Divorce rates are high, marriages are in trouble, infidelity seems commonplace, spouses barely talk to each other because they are so busy, and even solid marriages struggle with everyday issues.

We’ve all been touched by the pain of broken marriages and hurt spouses. The reason broken relationships and struggling marriages hurt so much is because marriages are so good.

Jesus’ teaching about remarriage and adultery is hard to hear, and for some it is particularly painful. Does it mean Jesus has abandoned some of us?

If this scripture was the only thing Jesus says about marriage and brokenness, then the struggle we have to live up to this high standard for marriage might cause us to be tempted to lose heart. But Jesus said he came, not to condemn the world, but to save it. Jesus promises to be with us always. Jesus promises to struggle alongside us. Jesus doesn’t just promise us, he shows his unconditional love for us when he dies on the cross.

When does God love? When we need it the most. God doesn’t just love us when we are doing our best, but God loves us when are far short of perfect.

So when your marriage is a source of life and joy, thank God! When everything falls apart and you are hurt and broken and the very foundation of your life seems over, seek Jesus Christ. If you feel like the Church or Jesus is telling you “stay away” because of your sin, they are not! God calls all of us sinners close to him.

Live It:
Thank God for love. Whether that is children, spouse, friendship or community offer up a prayer of thanks for the love in your life.

PS – Have you heard any of the homilies from HNOJ’s homily series “God: Who does he think he is?” Find them here.